∅

honestly considered never attending ms k's classes again. so sick of double standards, unfair reasoning and tired of constantly bending over for someone i'm losing more and more respect for as time passes.

i'm "never going to get it" anyway.

wouldn't have taken lit if i had foreseen myself feeling this bitter and discouraged over it. i've learnt so much since, and for a great deal of learning i've loved it too, but everything's going downhill and i'm beginning to feel so jaded.

quoting andre's tweet, "What I'm studying is supposed to be fun, but school made it so dreadful and torturous.."

poetry wasn't something i looked upon with so much dread last year. a level literature was a journey of discovery, the most enlightening subject i took by far, and it shaped my entire perception of my surroundings.

ms k, or maybe just the exam stress, i don't know, has taken the awe right out of that. there was a spark in me but it has since gone out.

and without passion lit as a subject is so motherfucking difficult.

need to find it again somehow.






me and nicole after metric last night. they were such a good act but i was pretty bummed about them not playing so many favourites. attended with my brother as i often do for gigs but leaving without him this time felt unusual. times are changing...





happy birthday egan